New Girl – Jess and Schmidt sittin’ in a tree?
The New Girl, “Valentine’s Day” episode was surprisingly less cutesy than I would have expected, it had a little naughtier theme than normal. There is something of a True Blood reunion in this episode between Lizzy Caplan and Ryan Kwanten, though they don’t have any scenes together.
We find that this is Jess’ first Vday being single in six years and she is determined to go out. She tries to convince Schmidt to go out with her, but he doesn’t usually go out on Vday because the women are not enough of a challenge due to the holiday. Jess finally gets Schmidt to agree to go out with her by telling him she has the “dirty twirl”, which is Jess-ese for being horny.
Julia and Nick decide to go all-out for Vday, while Winston continues to reignite his old flame.
Jess prepares for the night with CeCe by putting together an overnight bag just in case she has “one night sex”. She is dead-set on having a one-night stand for Vday and is only doing what “little Jess” wants.
Nick goes to Julia’s office to start their full-on Vday and is mistaken for a bike courier by Julia’s intern Nick is then relegated with comments from the intern about how many different ways he would like to take advantage of Julia until he is informed that Nick is Julia’s boyfriend. Julia gets Nick super cheesy cliched gift, but then makes him wait while she works into the night.
Winston goes to Shelby’s place for a nice quiet Vday alone with her, but ends up in the middle of girls night, nose strips and all. He eventually settles in with the women, giving dating advice to them in the end.
Schmidt and CeCe go out with Jess, if for no other reason but to make sure she gets the one-night stand right. They have to make sure Jess doesn’t hook up with someone she has anything in common with so she doesn’t get attached. Jess’ first attempt doesn’t work out well as he has too much in common with her. For her second try Jess works at being sexy by asking for his cherry (out of his drink, get your minds out of the gutter) and ends up choking on it. Cue Oliver (Ryan Kwanten of True Blood and Red Hill) as Jess’ one-night interest. In the meantime, Schmidt tries to work on his one-nighter. CeCe tries to assist by making another girl jealous, but Kyle (Stephen Amell) shows up and ruins her performance. Kyle is high on ‘shrooms and CeCe beats a hasty retreat with him as she says “he’s about to get real handsy and a little racist”.
Jess has to beg a ride to Oliver’s house from Schmidt, who is mortified by the box of 100 condoms she is toting around with her. At Oliver’s house Schmidt won’t leave so Jess calls CeCe to come get him. CeCe is stuck at a playground with Kyle. Things quickly go downhill for Jess when Oliver’s ex shows up because they still live together, CeCe, Schmidt and Kyle, who has peed in his pants, all show up immediately after Schmidt. The situation goes from bad to weird when Oliver’s ex starts making out with Kyle in front of CeCe who is riding home with he and Schmidt who also has a huge crush on her. Nonetheless, they all leave except Oliver’s ex who continues to loudly eat tacos and watch Jess and Oliver make out. Oliver gets emotional and tells Jess how much he misses his ex, which she abruptly nips in the bud. Awkward.
During all of this, Nick has been waiting for Julia to wrap things up so they can continue their Vday celebration. While waiting, he has a conversation with Julia’s intern that backfires and convinces the intern to give up trying to be a lawyer. Nick saves the day and does the intern’s work for Julia since it is his fault the kid left. This leads to a sweet moment between the two cynics that is ended with Julia’s phone ringing and her work taking over again. I feel that we are being set up for the downfall of Nick and Julia via her job coming first, something that Nick has avoided by leaving the lawyer world.
The episode wraps up well; Winston wins points and makes up for standing Shelby up on a past Vday with how well he handled being blindsided by girl’s night.
When Jess makes it back to the apartment without having accomplished her mission of having her Vday one-night stand, she finds Schmidt in an exceptionally good mood. He explains to her the best way a one-night stand works is to do it with someone that you already know and trust, don’t overthink it and that you make sure that you leave immediately after, never stay until morning. You can see the wheels turning in Jess’ head as Schmidt is talking and I think everyone watching was collectively hoping we were wrong about her train of thought, but no, we were right on the money. We see Jess grab her 100-count box of condoms and sneak over to Schmidt’s room, chanting “Don’t overthink it”, while we pray she starts thinking at all before going through with it. Just as she is about to open Schmidt’s door, Nick catches her and puts two and two together, realizing what Jess was about to do when she drops her massive collection of condoms on the floor in front of Schmidt’s door. Nick is so disturbed that he physically removes Jess from the situation as she tries to babble her way out of being caught.
As we breathe a sigh of relief at Nick saving the day, we see that Schmidt would not have been available for Jess anyway as he is a little preoccupied by his obsession for the entire season, CeCe. Again, no surprise, but good for Schmidt. The episode concludes with an afterward of Jess calling CeCe the next morning to tell her she almost ridiculously hooked up with the Schmidt the night before. CeCe acts incredulous and is speaking very quietly, to which we see she didn’t follow one of the main rules of the one-night stand, she didn’t leave. Jess’ phone call from the breakfast table reaches CeCe in Schmidt’s bedroom with an unreadable expression on her face. Guilt, regret or reluctant happiness? It remains to be seen.
I enjoyed this episode. I still think they hit with their best bits at the end of the show and would love to see these moments interspersed instead of this formula of trying to end with a bang (one that isn’t all that explosive, but is worthwhile). I want the hits to keep coming! They did take a much better route than if they had tried to help Jess find love on Vday, and they scenes with Ryan Kwanten were a great use of his guest star status. I’m so happy they utilized him well and his presence seemed to up the game a bit. I am looking for more episodes like this one, looking forward to next week!